Yet again it is after midnight and i have just got in from the wedding reception that preempted my fake tan situation yesterday. Well i say i just got in from the wedding reception, i left after 3 hours, sometimes they can just be a little tedious. I wasn’t drinking, even the soft drinks were overpriced and the 60 year old guy from my work that still lives with his mother was quite drunk and seemed to forget what personal space is. I normally don’t mind this whole personal space thing but when they stroke your arm because they spilt a drink down you it’s just down right creepy.
I made my excuse of ‘I’m tired and have to be up early’ and drove back to the village to join my friends at the local working mans club. This place reminds me of Peter Kays Phoenix Nights but cheap drinks and a cheerful attitude is sometimes just better. I still didn’t drink but god forbid the night i do and remember to blog, that will be interesting!
I thought i’d give you a little update on my meeting with Humpty Dumpty and Humpty Dumpy’s mum today. I didn’t slip up – called the baby a ‘she’ or ‘her’. I couldn’t lie so my lines were:
‘Aww isn’t her changing bag nice’
‘I really like her dress’
‘Her blanket is just so cute!’
The whole time i saw her all i could think of was Humpty Dumpty, and yes i do feel like a bad person for this!
I had been told that Humpty Dumpty’s mum was very clingy over her daughter and didn’t like anyone holding her so she was tested when my friend Lyla said about me,
‘Yea she was holding Beth’s baby and smashed her head against a wall’
Let me just say, yes i was holding my friend Beth’s baby a few months ago standing in a doorway, she wriggled and her head hit the door frame, only lightly though! At the time i stepped through the door to her parents looking at me with a ‘was that my child?’ expression. I had to admit it was, but the she never cried and didn’t even acknowledge it had happened! Her parents did laugh it off but my all friends like to remind me of it!
I know Lyla did this on purpose as she thinks the same as me, so when she suggested i hold the baby, Humpty Dumpty’s mums face was a picture. I wish i could take a snapshot at that precise moment in time and frame it. I was allowed and didn’t hurt the baby (thankgod). I do have to admit when she smiles it is kind of cute but i can’t shake the thought of the Puss In Boots film.
Day 62 Update – I had a conversation with 3 good looking guys at the wedding reception about dry cleaning, that is the closest man action i got today.
Although i woke up with a text from my good friend Tara this morning saying
‘I know someone that is interested in you!! xxxx’ my reply: ‘who and why?! x’
Ok so i know who she is talking about, Mr. New To The Pub guy from yesterday, but i don’t want to look keen/eager and want as much info from her as possible. Apparantly after i left he was making enquiries about me. Oh how my drunk friends bigged me up to him with such lines as
‘She’s ditzy, you’ll never have a boring day with her, you’ll be laughing all the time’
Thank you friends! I will admit i’m ditzy, i have a tendency to speak before i think which leads to stupid things coming out of my mouth, but i can laugh at my own stupidity and i know i do it so i guess everyone’s a winner. I entertain others and myself without actually meaning to!
He also would have come out tonight to ‘get to know me better’ (his words) but i was at this blasted wedding recption. Bloody typical!
Anyway it seems like everyone in my circle of friends knows as tonight many people told me they heard i had pulled last night. I didn’t even speak to the guy! Now if i ever do meet him again i will feel even more awkward, i know they’re doing it as they are routing for me, i’m one of the only singles in the group but it just puts pressure on me!
Beth (owner of the child whose head i ‘smashed into a wall’) summed it up for me nicely saying
‘You can’t just be ignoring these guys or brushing them off, it’s nearly been a year!’
Somehow i don’t think i needed reminding…